**dusts cobwebs**::tap tap::: is this thing on?
Hello ghosts of yesteryear. remember me? 4 years and 7 months ago I created my first post on this thing. It was directed at my financial woes, insecurities and downright stupidity. 4 years and 7 months ago I PROCLAIMED LOUDLY, that things were going to change. 4 years and 7 months ago I had an "epiphany!" I even called the post that. 4 years and 7 months later, not much has changed.
I'm here to face my demons a little bit. To broadcast that I've been mostly all talk. To put out in the open, for whatever reason, how I feel and what I've gone through.
Cold hard facts. I ran up a lot of credit card and tax debt. I spent 4 years coming up with master plans to attack it, save, and remove my cloak of shame. I spent days actually doing it. Until 2013.
In about March/April 2013 the anxiety and fear of living the rest of my life not being able to afford vacations, an engagement ring, owning a house, having savings, raising a kid and all the other things money kind of dictates, I FINALLY took the appropriate action. I contacted the non-profit, Consumer Credit Counseling Services of San Francisco and after eliminating every "excuse" I had for how I couldn't survive without my credit cards, I pulled the trigger.
At $16,552 in credit cards, I called and canceled every single one. All FIVE of them. In a matter of minutes, I converted to an all cash budget. Whatever I earned, that's all there was. With the exception of about one or two times, due to poor financial decisions, I have lived now EIGHT months with only the cash I earn. Something I thought was impossible, was actually REALLY easy to do. On top of lowering the amount I paid each month combined, about $550 to $332, this service got two of my interest rates down to 2%, two to 9.99% and one to 7.99%. I will, if I simply follow the minimum payments, have everything paid off in 5 years from the date of inception. But beyond the money, the weight of the anxiety and fear has been lifted I no longer have that depression surrounding money! It still has a long way to go for me to be HAPPY, but I finally got rid of the monster!
At first, five years sounded like, "well, I guess I've got five years to get everything else in order to start my life at 35." But, as I just made a $500 payment - which saved me about two years on one card and about $220 in interest- I know that I'm capable of saving, budgeting, and accomplishing my goal faster than that.
2014 is about changing my focus. I was given Tony Robbins Ultimate Edge for Christmas and have found it very empowering so far. "Wherever focus goes, energy flows." I was always focused on not having money and how do I manage my credit card debt and, shockingly, all my energy went into not having money. Now I'm focused on saving, budgeting, self-control, living within my means, and guess what, my energy goes towards saving, budgeting, self-control, and living within my means. Say whaaa?
What's the point of all this? Why am I telling you? Because just like Mr. Tony Robbins, if my sharing what I've learned and discovered can help just one person, it's all worth it. So if you have ANY questions or fears or are in the same boat I was, please understand first and foremost, I UNDERSTAND THE SHAME that goes with it, and will NOT judge you. How could I? Second, please reach out, or click the link. The anxiety of money problems is one large sunufubitch, but you can overcome it!
On a side note, if any of my friends actually read this, and you think I'm lame that I, "never come out," please understand that I WANT TO, but I'm really focused on saving and accomplishing as much as I possibly can this year. That doesn't mean I wont have ANY fun, but I'll be more prone to hang out if it's not OUT at a bar or restaurant. And I'll do a better job at planning shindigs at my place! Deal?
More posts to come. This was just kind of a random smattering of thoughts, probably poorly written. oh well!
Showing posts with label budget. Show all posts
Showing posts with label budget. Show all posts
Monday, January 6, 2014
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
1.27.10 - 2.9.10 & 2.10.10
Wow. How quickly fourteen days can go by. It's actually rather scary how I've thought about this blog multiple times every single day for fourteen days, without one real solid effort to actually post something. It makes me think about so many things that I tend to simply think about, but never actually do, and the next thing I know, BAM, fifteen days has passed and I'm trying to play catch up. Well there really isn't a point in playing catch up for this blog in particular, so I'll leave days 27 through 40 blank, and refer to them as a "Dead Motivation Period" as I'm sure I'll encounter it again at some point. Sad.
What actually happened that kept me from writing for FOURTEEN STRAIGHT DAYS? Absolutely nothing. I wasn't in jail. I wasn't paralyzed. There has been no emergencies. No hookers and/or blow. Nothing. Why didn't I do it then, if there was nothing preventing it from happening? Hmmm. A question that I think I need to remember! Scratch that. A question I KNOW I need to remember AND ask myself on a daily basis. I'm going to BOLD it!
WHY DIDN'T I DO IT? (And, should there still be time, why aren't I doing it now?)
We'll see how well I remember this. Meh. Who am I kidding? I know I'll remember it. The real issue is what I do when I don't have an answer to it and to not create an excuse. Gosh. Excuses seem to rule such a high percentage of life. And I'm not just talking about me. I think we're all guilty. A TV show. Dinner with a friend. I made dinner and watched a movie and just simply lost track of time. Sure some things may actually keep me from doing things, but not for fourteen straight days. Stop putting such simple things off, Kyle. Gosh I hate that guy!
Sigh. Seems like today's blog will be brought to you by the word: Random. And the number: 14.
Just to share, here is some of the stuff I remember (at the moment) from the last two weeks:
o Fundraiser for my friend Tina for LLS @ The House of Blues where Steel Panther performed (4 separate links there - two songs and you definitely need to listen to the lyrics! haha)
o Snowboarding at Bear mountain with Jim
o Golfing with my club for the first time in about six months (and losing my match on the 17th hole) aka first Saturday off since Thanksgiving.
o I didn't stick to my $10/day budget AT ALL!
o I got an early birthday present of Carrie Underwood tickets!! Thanks Marissa!
o I created a new budget tracking sheet for February to stay on top of my finances on a daily basis and see how and where I'm wasting my money
o I didn't get any further on my grad school decision
o Jim and I decided we're going to repaint the living room, cover the couches, and go in on a flat screen so the living room looks nice. (don't you dare bring up the budget. Flat screens are priorities! And so is coming home to a nice home.)
o I only went to Cowboy Country twice.
o I drank too much.
o I ate lots of leftovers
o My body seems to have... lost it's love for milk, and I'm still trying to work on that. I don't think I needed to share that. Just wanted to throw in a little "disgust" to go with the "humor" and the "sad" and the "happy."
That pretty much sums everything up for today and the past two weeks. I apologize to all my "loyal followers" (haha) for making you wait two weeks. Until tomorrow, there's day 41 of 365.
Maybe I'll start taking a picture of myself every day, too. Same pose and place and see how I change! HA!
What actually happened that kept me from writing for FOURTEEN STRAIGHT DAYS? Absolutely nothing. I wasn't in jail. I wasn't paralyzed. There has been no emergencies. No hookers and/or blow. Nothing. Why didn't I do it then, if there was nothing preventing it from happening? Hmmm. A question that I think I need to remember! Scratch that. A question I KNOW I need to remember AND ask myself on a daily basis. I'm going to BOLD it!
WHY DIDN'T I DO IT? (And, should there still be time, why aren't I doing it now?)
We'll see how well I remember this. Meh. Who am I kidding? I know I'll remember it. The real issue is what I do when I don't have an answer to it and to not create an excuse. Gosh. Excuses seem to rule such a high percentage of life. And I'm not just talking about me. I think we're all guilty. A TV show. Dinner with a friend. I made dinner and watched a movie and just simply lost track of time. Sure some things may actually keep me from doing things, but not for fourteen straight days. Stop putting such simple things off, Kyle. Gosh I hate that guy!
Sigh. Seems like today's blog will be brought to you by the word: Random. And the number: 14.
Just to share, here is some of the stuff I remember (at the moment) from the last two weeks:
o Fundraiser for my friend Tina for LLS @ The House of Blues where Steel Panther performed (4 separate links there - two songs and you definitely need to listen to the lyrics! haha)
o Snowboarding at Bear mountain with Jim
o Golfing with my club for the first time in about six months (and losing my match on the 17th hole) aka first Saturday off since Thanksgiving.
o I didn't stick to my $10/day budget AT ALL!
o I got an early birthday present of Carrie Underwood tickets!! Thanks Marissa!
o I created a new budget tracking sheet for February to stay on top of my finances on a daily basis and see how and where I'm wasting my money
o I didn't get any further on my grad school decision
o Jim and I decided we're going to repaint the living room, cover the couches, and go in on a flat screen so the living room looks nice. (don't you dare bring up the budget. Flat screens are priorities! And so is coming home to a nice home.)
o I only went to Cowboy Country twice.
o I drank too much.
o I ate lots of leftovers
o My body seems to have... lost it's love for milk, and I'm still trying to work on that. I don't think I needed to share that. Just wanted to throw in a little "disgust" to go with the "humor" and the "sad" and the "happy."
That pretty much sums everything up for today and the past two weeks. I apologize to all my "loyal followers" (haha) for making you wait two weeks. Until tomorrow, there's day 41 of 365.
Maybe I'll start taking a picture of myself every day, too. Same pose and place and see how I change! HA!
Thursday, January 21, 2010
1.20.10
Almost through three weeks already? I feel like I say this every week, yet I'm consistently amazed at how quickly time just flies by and I feel like I've done nothing.
Today was rather boring. Got to work, did my thing. I did have to go to the IRS office though, which was an hours worth of silence. I think the only exciting thing to happen was wondering if, while at the IRS office, I was going to get a parking ticket for an expired meter. THAT would have been hilarious to me. The feds giveth and the state taketh away hah! Fortunately, this whole rain thing probably kept the wonderful parking enforcement in their car and I escaped ticketless.
I did decide to go back to something I was doing last year. A $10 per day budget. This means I'm going to go back to cooking, and finding ways to do things cheaper. I made a lot of progress on debt last year when I was doing this, and as most people do, I reverted back to my old self. Change is so very difficult to make permanent. I feel like this will always be a battle. Trying to figure out new ways to stay on course and find what actually works for me, is such a tiring fight, but better than not fighting at all.
After work I headed home with the intention of driving up to Studio City for dinner if the traffic wasn't bad. Traffic wasn't deadly, nor was it great, but the plans were thrown out when an emergency popped up (not with me). So I headed home and ate dinner with my roommate. Tried Foggia Italian Deli for the first time. Holy crap those sandwiches are huge. It was great. I need to go back there and buy some nice meat and cheese!
After dinner, I enjoyed some American Idol (funny picture attached), a couple other tv shows and now I'm heading to bed. Until tomorrow, there's day 20 of 365.
Today was rather boring. Got to work, did my thing. I did have to go to the IRS office though, which was an hours worth of silence. I think the only exciting thing to happen was wondering if, while at the IRS office, I was going to get a parking ticket for an expired meter. THAT would have been hilarious to me. The feds giveth and the state taketh away hah! Fortunately, this whole rain thing probably kept the wonderful parking enforcement in their car and I escaped ticketless.
I did decide to go back to something I was doing last year. A $10 per day budget. This means I'm going to go back to cooking, and finding ways to do things cheaper. I made a lot of progress on debt last year when I was doing this, and as most people do, I reverted back to my old self. Change is so very difficult to make permanent. I feel like this will always be a battle. Trying to figure out new ways to stay on course and find what actually works for me, is such a tiring fight, but better than not fighting at all.
After work I headed home with the intention of driving up to Studio City for dinner if the traffic wasn't bad. Traffic wasn't deadly, nor was it great, but the plans were thrown out when an emergency popped up (not with me). So I headed home and ate dinner with my roommate. Tried Foggia Italian Deli for the first time. Holy crap those sandwiches are huge. It was great. I need to go back there and buy some nice meat and cheese!
After dinner, I enjoyed some American Idol (funny picture attached), a couple other tv shows and now I'm heading to bed. Until tomorrow, there's day 20 of 365.
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